This is a sad blog. Consider yourself warned.
The past several days have given me ample food for thought as well as time to think; 1000+ miles of driving will do that for a person. And in my travels, I see something consistent within our culture as a people.
We strive to fill our lives. With what? Just about anything. Depends on who one is. But have you noticed, in our quest to become more efficient, we have simply become more busy? There are tools, facilitators, that people invest in to keep themselves organized. And yet, as we invest in more and more of these time-saving devices, we find ourselves running out of time. Again and again. Despite our best efforts, our lives become busier. What gives? That is the quest to save time. A quest that seems to be a failure; for when we find we have time to spare, we fill it with something else.
Even our leisure is exhausting. Have you noticed this? I just took a two-week vacation. I'm tired, man. Lots of fun; but not relaxing at all. Have you ever heard someone say, "I need a vacation to recover from my vacation?" How often do we become stressed because of something we're doing on our "day off" and so get bent out of shape because of that? We have to make time to relax; and even then, we can't relax because we are oppressed by all the things we're putting off or ignoring so we can "relax."
And what about the quest for identity? Geez, it's hard to be a well-differentiated American. 24/7, society screams impossible ideals at us and then castigates us for not living up to them. Have you noticed this? A teenage girl is supposed to be pretty, wear stylish clothes, be thin as a rail, have a boyfriend, possess a perfect complexion, etc. And if she falls short, she is rejected. A man is supposed to be a hardened warrior, capable of taking down a pack of wolves with his bare hands; a scholar, knowledgable about all aspects of life; an innovator, someone who lives on resourcefulness; a thinker, capable of accurately assessing difficult situations and responding accordingly; and a listener, someone who can meet the emotional needs of his spouse and family. Where are these people, these ideals? Hint: they don't exist except in ad campaigns.
But we must be our own individual! So we strive to create a personal style, a personal code, something to set ourselves apart from the pack; and in so doing, we find that we only imitate others in countless ways. We buy because we want to imitate those who have; we work long hours because we want to be like those who have money. We work out (granted, it's good to be healthy... duh) because we believe we will fit into culture better if we are fit. How much of what we do is simply because we think that we will be more accepted if we do this or that? "Hey, you! You need to be your own person! And to help you do that, we're mass-marketing this stylish new car that can be yours for only thousands of dollars!"
Which brings me to another thought. The quest to buy and to have has surpassed the quest to save and prepare. Have you noticed this? The concern is always with the immediate, not the long-term. Can't afford it? No sweat. There's a credit card for that. Credit wrecked? No sweat. We won't check it. The important thing is for you to have stuff, and we will do what it takes to make sure you have your stuff. (Until someone gets tired of not being paid, anyway.)
They're even selling us on stuff we don't need! Does my razor really need a small motor in it? C'mon, seriously. What's wrong with the unmotorized one? Nothing, except for the fact that it doesn't have a motor. (Let's ignore the fact that it does the job just fine without one.)
I'm glad that phones are becoming smarter. They do make life easier. They also make it easier for random crap to invade your life. How many times have you entered a coffeeshop and seen two people sitting at the same table, not saying a word to each other, but messing with their phones? Texts, emails, random apps doing their thing, all demanding your ever so precious time. Time that you're running out of.
So where are we going? We're on a quest to fill our lives with stuff. To fill our lives with people, our bank accounts with money, our homes with things, and what do we have to show for it? Read the papers.
Broken marriages and failed relationships. Pyramid schemes and identity theft. Debt, destruction, and thieves. So we purchase items or invest time to protect these things; and the cycle repeats itself.
Don't get me wrong; some things are necessary. Positive relationships are important and should be fought for. Money is needed to survive and should be earned. We need a roof over our heads and amenities to get by. But at what point do we start serving our lifestyle? Or our desired lifestyle?
Or when do we ever raise the question? It's easy to pull the trigger on a new tshirt and ignore the 15 I already have sitting in the drawer. It's easy to overcommit myself to people because I'm scared of "letting someone down" or because I'd rather not face the consequences of simply saying, "No." It's easy to buy a new computer because the one I have is a year old (forget the fact it still works fine). These things we do without thinking.
And I wish that we would stop and ponder. In 2004, over half of college undergraduates had four or more credit cards; they had an average of $2200 in debt per person. The average cardholder is expected to owe well over $6000 by 2010. It takes an average of 330 hours to repair the damage done from identity theft. Over a million kids each year watch their parents get divorced. Nearly 10% of the nation's population suffers from depression; depression among children rises by 23% every year. Nearly 7 million people will suffer from panic attacks in 2009; I am among that number.
What's wrong with us?
We, as a culture, as a nation, as a people, are spinning, spinning, spinning out of control. We will feed on ourselves until there's nothing left and we self-destruct. We get so caught up in ourselves, our lives, our things, our busy-ness, and our incessant, manic compulsions for bigger, better, more, that we can't even see that we're slowly killing ourselves.
Can we learn to slow down? Can we learn to relax? Can we learn to seek others first and not ourselves? I hope so... And I hope we will see sooner rather than later.
Told you this was going to be sad.
Father, forgive us... For we do not know what we do.
